We read a letter written by Bonhoeffer shortly before he was executed in the Introduction to Christian Theology class. In the letter, he traced how God no longer was the working hypothesis in morals, politics and science. He wasn't lamenting this. On the contrary, he thought that "[F]or the sake of intellectual honesty, that working hypothesis should be dropped, or as far as possible eliminted." The theme of a suffering God was clearly shown.
The teacher asked us what we thought about that letter. One student replied by making a distinction between those who believed and those who didn't. He assumed that those who believed (meaning Christians) had to have God in mind in every aspect of their life; and those who didn't (non-Christians) would not be bothered with our God. I didn't feel comfortable with all these Us vs. Other talks. Besides, I didn't think that's the point Bonhoeffer was making.
Another student followed by saying many people in HK (he meant the non-Christians) wouldn't think about God in all that they were doing. Again, there was the assumption of those who belonged and those who didn't here.
I'm a bit worried at the way people read their own ideas in other people's writing. People give very high-sounding model answers. But then what? Bonhoeffer was honest about how he didn't always feel God's presence.
I don't always feel God's presence. I wish there will be a time when all of us can honestly face our own feelings and situations instead of giving the model answers. I don't want a textbook kind of faith. I wish people won't be snubbed whenever their voice their doubts and uncertainties. I wish people won't tell me to pray harder when I am lost in all those God-talks.
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