(Editing my sermon in Pacific Coffee, Shatin.)
Now I know what copy editing is.
John and I went through my sermon yesterday. We did it line by line. He gave me many useful and constructive comments, and told me what worked and what didn't. His help on the language was also very important and much appreciated. After all, English isn't my first language.
When he told me certain parts were good, I asked him why they were so. I learned a lot not just in how to write a sermon, but also in editing! I could see that he must be a very good editor. It's surprising how little I much I had learned about editorial work not in my career as an editor by in our going through my sermon together.
John said he wanted me to be more profound. What did he mean? I could kind of grasp his meaning yesterday but I understand more now. I was telling people what to think in my first draft. But I didn't really let people think on their own. I was saying, "Hey guys, what I am saying is the truth. So listen, and listen very hard." The draft had already been toned down bit but obviously it wasn't enough. There was so much fire in my heart that I just wanted to scream. I needed to be more subtle and not hitting people on their head.
And then I thought about the Feminist Theology class. It wasn't bad. But the teacher was so passionate about overcoming domination and deconstructing systems of oppression that she didn't really allow us to think or disagree. There wasn't dialogue. At best, we had different monologues. So, how can we keep our fire and keep the doors open for dialogue? Difficult, but hopefully not impossible.
My second draft is almost finished. Just need to cool things down a bit before I read it again to see how it goes.
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