I imagine Jesus...

I think he must have dry skin. Living in that region, walking around all the time, and without the help of any skin lotion? He must have dry skin.

Actually, I imagine him to have dry skin because I have dry skin.

We were talking about the image of God in the Feminist Theology class today. We started from addressing God as God the Mother to God language, God the Father, sexism...

Then Rose mentioned a disabled God. Why couldn't a disabled person see God as a disabled God? She asked.

God is all powerful; God is also the suffering God. Which one do we prefer? Do we only want a almighty one so that this almighty one can protect us? Do we see God more like a gang leader who offers us protection against our enemies.

I talked about Jesus having dry skin. And then I talked about St Fransis of Assisi who made himself embrace a leper. By embracing the leper, it was said that he learned to embrace all people the way Jesus did. But had it ever occurred to him that the leper didn't want to be embraced? The hug would definitely hurt.

There was a time when I didn't want to be touched or embraced because it hurt, because of the fear of infection. That was a time when I had very bad skin. I didn't want people forcing themselves to "accept" me or "love" me. I saw in most of their embraces as a massage to their ego, that they could tell themselves they did as Jesus had taught them. But they had never asked me whether I wanted to be touched or not. And when I showed displeasure, I was usually the one who got the blame.

Now I can shake hand, hug people at TFS. I feel safe there. I know that even if I can't touch people, they will understand. They won't give me the weird look.

Of course, I want to remain "huggable". I wish I will never go back to those bandaged days.